What To Do If You’re Being Blackmailed or Scammed?

So, you’re being blackmailed or scammed, or you know of somebody who is. Don’t worry, be happy, we are here to help. Here is a quick summary of what we are about to discuss:

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Article Summary:

1) Accept the consequences of the blackmail or scam
2) Never comply or even discuss their demands or engage in any discussion about it
3) Tell them that you are not interested, and if they want they can go ahead with their threats
4) Immediately block and report the scammers to prevent further contact after sending the message in point #3. Prevent any further communication with them
5) Monitor the situation
6) Seek support from a trusted individual for emotional or otherwise assistance if necessary

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How to Get Rid of Blackmailers / Scammers

I’ve recently worked with a woman who left a toxic relationship, and her ex was blackmailing her by threatening to release her personal private photos. To prevent this, he demanded a certain amount of money from her. 

In another situation, I encountered a person being blackmailed for not strictly following certain business regulations, with the blackmailer demanding payment to avoid legal action. These two cases were on my mind as I wrote this article.

First of all, counterintuitively realize that it’s not about you, it’s about the person who is blackmailing or scamming you. You should feel bad for your tormentor because only a person with a really bad life could do something like that. It is their karma, and they are destroying their own spiritual and emotional well-being, but that shouldn’t mean that you have to go down to their level.

This step is important because a lot of time people take it personally first for being a victim of a blackmail or scam, but also because they believe that they somehow should have known better and avoided this situation.

However, the truth is that bad things will happen, and the longer we wait, the higher the chance that something really bad will happen to us. Small bad things will happen to us more often, while big bad things will happen to us less often. It is not pessimism, but rather realism in acknowledging statistical probability, which cannot be avoided, but for which we can prepare. Often, we don’t really know what went wrong in our lives, but something bad could and might happen to us eventually.

And I’m not talking exclusively about negative things, but also talking about positive things. So good things will happen to you, and very good things will happen to you eventually, and it is just a matter of time that they will happen, not that this is the topic of conversation.

So yes, today you got blackmailed or scammed. Tomorrow you will have to deal with something else, and the longer you wait to fix the negative things that need fixing, the more negativity will accumulate in your life, and the less time you actually gonna have to live your life and enjoy it.

Yes, you don’t want to have negative events, but that’s unrealistic. Even the wealthiest people can’t avoid all the negativity in their lives by trying to somehow buy their way out of all the problems. This is, on a side note, also one of the reasons why being rich is not the solution for everything.

Even I, the so-called happiest man in the world, cannot avoid all forms of negativity, and bad things happen to me on a regular basis. However, I know how to deal with negativity if it happens in my life in order to maximize my happiness and live my best life always, and you can learn to do the same, too.

So in the case of being blackmailed and scammed, nobody is perfect. I’m not perfect, you’re not perfect, so there’s always an opportunity for something to go wrong in our lives, and it could very well be being blackmailed or scammed.

After all, scammers are doing everything in their power to get as many victims as they can, and eventually, we can become a target of their attack. When this happens, often we are not prepared or informed to avoid it.

Of course, we need to do everything in our power to avoid being in those situations in the first place. However, that being said, I also recommend not wasting all our lives trying to avoid every potential source of negativity because it is unrealistic. By focusing on negativity, we will become negative in the process. So, instead of cultivating a good life by trying to avoid negativity, we may end up creating a bad life because we are constantly stressing about an infinite amount of things that can go wrong.

And since we can’t avoid every form of negativity in life, we should do our due diligence and try to avoid the most obvious pitfalls. After that, we should eventually stop looking for danger around every corner, being anxious to live our lives, living in terror of what can happen next, and deal with the consequences of negative actions as soon as they happen.

Or as Mark Twain once said “I am an old man and have known a great many troubles, but most of them never happened.”

As such, being too proactive about avoiding all forms of negativity can be detrimental because positivity trumps negativity. It is scientifically proven that it is better to focus on being positive rather than negative, as happiness offers a tremendous amount of advantages over unhappiness. I have discussed this topic in much detail in my book called Optimal Happiness.

Also, when bad things happen, as they inevitably will, try not to lose all hope in the world. I have seen numerous people experience negativity in their lives, causing them to avoid dating, traveling, shopping, going to certain parts of town, and overall living their lives as they hide from the world, saying it is a dark, negative, and unfriendly place. While it is important to remain vigilant, we shouldn’t stop living just because something bad could or did happen to us.

In case of blackmail or scam, the best thing you can do is just accept the consequences of that blackmail or scam. In other words, if you have a direct line of communication with your tormentor, just tell them that you don’t care, and if they want, they should go ahead with the threats.

This step is important because they need to know that you mean business and that you are not afraid of them. This will put the power back into your court as more often than not, these people have multiple blackmails and scams happening at the same time, and it is time-consuming for them to go on with threats for somebody who is not cooperating. For them it’s more cost-effective to look for the potential next victim who will be more cooperative.

The worst thing you can do is to actually interact with the person who is blackmailing or scamming you and do exactly what they want you to do, which more often than not involves financial compensation. This can end up costing you more in the long run than dealing with the potential outcomes of them following through on their threats.

After all, if they were going to do what they said they would do, they would likely do it regardless. The chance of the blackmailer or scammer stopping their threats once you comply is very low. If you give in to their demands, they will only have more incentive to continue exploiting you for everything you have. It becomes almost like the Sword of Damocles, forever hanging over you and threatening to fall, and by complying with their demands, you are only delaying their threats.

After all, nobody actually said that the blackmail or scam will finish as soon as a person gives in. A much more likely scenario is that the scammer will realize that you will do everything they want, and they will never stop with their threats.

In other words, it is best to cut your losses as soon as you find yourself inside a bad situation.

So, tell them the blackmailer or scammer that you are not interested, and if they still want to, they can go ahead with their threats, then block all connection with your tormentor. Also, report them, and if they come back in any way, report and block them again. After this, there will be an uncomfortable period of time when you just have to wait and see what happens.

If nothing happens, great. You dodged that bullet. If they actually do something, well, it was likely that they would have done it anyway, and it is part of accepting the consequences of the blackmail or scam. Hopefully, this one event should not break you completely, and even if it does cause you considerable discomfort, it’s better than indefinitely being at the mercy of your captor.

In terms of the above two examples, in the case of personal pictures, this person could send these pictures to individuals that the girl did not want to see. This would be indeed shameful, but at the same time, the blackmailer would be in danger of being caught, banned, spending a lot of time creating fake accounts only to see them banned, ultimately wasting their energy on a person who was not cooperating.

In the second case, the company was indeed at risk of a major financial fine, but the blackmailer would also go on record, exposing their face to the world and legal system, effectively branding themselves as a predator. Engaging in a lengthy financial and legal action would be necessary, while it might be easier for the blackmailer to find a more cooperative target in order to attempt to obtain easy money.

On a side note, people often ask me why I never get into trouble like fights or have people steal from me, while these situations seem to happen more frequently to others. I tell them that I am a relatively big guy who exercises, walks confidently, and carries myself in a way that communicates to others that if they were to mess with me, they might win the confrontation but they would also suffer losses. Essentially, I employ a psychological principle that says if a lion is pursuing two gazelles, one gazelle only needs to be slightly faster than the other, but not significantly so. This means that when a fraudster is looking for a target, they will typically choose a weaker person and avoid someone who appears strong.

Therefore, it is important for us to continuously work on ourselves to ensure that we are strong enough to handle any challenges, whether they be physical, financial, social, or otherwise. For example, if I need to pay a $100 parking ticket, it will not hurt as much if I have $10,000 in my bank account compared to someone with only $100 (or less). Being healthy means we can cope with physical injuries and illnesses, and socially it may mean that losing one friend is not as devastating if we have others to rely upon.

And if issues persist, we should assess why they continue to occur. Perhaps we are living in a troublesome neighborhood, surrounding ourselves with negative influences, or engaging in habits that attract problems (e.g., smoking, gambling, and taking drugs). In extreme cases, we might need to make significant changes such as relocating, altering our social circle, profession, or personal routines. Hopefully, it won’t come to that, and we can quickly replace any losses we incur.

Moreover, not all scams are the same, so your response might need to vary depending on the situation you are dealing with. For example, in some countries, a policeman may stop you and ask for a bribe. The principles discussed in this post can serve as guidelines, but it is important to remember that if you spot a scam, you should stop engaging with them as soon as possible.

Don’t even do it for entertainment purposes, as the more you engage with this or other dark sides of human nature, the more you will be affected by it. Remember that we generally do not want to have negative emotions, so unethical behavior should be avoided at all costs, whether we are engaging in it or someone is doing it to us.

Furthermore, I like another quote that states that even if you have been going in the wrong direction for years, it is still the right thing to turn around and go in the correct direction regardless of how long it will take to get back.

Overall, do stay vigilant for potential red flags, and if something seems too good to be true, it’s probably likely that it is. Try to avoid sharing too much personal and sensitive information online. In the case of dealing with a negative situation like being blackmailed or scammed, you can always contact the police or ask for advice from someone close to you, as this is a time to look for social support, rather than isolate yourself completely.

You can also contact us at Optimal Happiness because we are here to help with this and many other forms of negativity in your life. We are experts in positive and negative emotions, and at this point, we are really good at doing exactly that. At the very least, you will get really good advice. We even offer a free 30-minute call, where we can review whatever you might be dealing with today.

Stay safe and happy.