Trouble in Paradise: When Everyone is Suffering and All Suffering is Relative

Today, I woke up feeling like there is trouble in paradise. Everything starts with something small. I see someone one liking my hobby blog Zero To Do Hero (play of words Zero to Hero, with added To Do, like?) and after checking their blog I find that this person is also a photographer blogger with a low tech wordpress blog but A LOT of engagement. 

trouble in paradise, an image of a man in forest

This feeds into my insecurity of having to work hard to get anything I want from life, thinking that some people get what they want handed to them on a silver plat. 

However, this insecurity quickly disappears, replaced by a realization that all work is hard and we are constantly working towards something new. This means that all work creates feelings of doubt and insecurity.

Moreover, while we are focused on everything new we want to achieve, we often forget about everything we already have. We start to take it for granted, forgetting to be grateful, thinking that there is only trouble in paradise. 

At around this moment, I was contacted by my client, a woman, a high level professional, who is financially settled for life. However, she complained to me saying how unfair her life seems to be. It is like a “constant uphill battle” – she said. She constantly has to deal with gender discrimination at work, having to work twice as hard for everything she wants compared to her male counterparts. 

And this is virtually the same story for everyone else who thinks how bad, unfair, and difficult their lives are, often chasing to forget about everyone else’s problems, screaming: “Look at me, look how horrible my life is, and all my suffering! Me, me, me!” We forget that everyone is suffering and all suffering is relative

We should revisit the gratitude exercise, saying “thank you for everything we already have in our lives,” remembering that it is all trouble in paradise and we already have a pretty good life. Everything else is a bonus.

Coming back to this blogger who ruffled my feathers and made me write a philosophical work of art simply because he likes one of my posts, I realized that I should take a closer look at what he is doing to create this success, and copy his best practices. After all, he was engaging with my blog and focusing on creating his community, which is something I can do even better.

In the end, I reframed my negative thinking into a positive one, proving once again for myself that most suffering is self created and there is always an option to be happy.

Have a nice day!

Roman Russo

Roman Russo

Roman Russo is the visionary founder, senior happiness coach, and Chief Happiness Officer of Optimal Happiness. He has written the revolutionary Optimal Happiness: The Fastest and Surest Way to Reach Your Happiest Potential, a must-read book about achieving our happiest potential. After researching this field for over eight years, Roman is confident that anyone can become happy and invites us to undertake this transformation. Are you ready to start living the life you always meant to live?

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