If You Aren’t Holding It, You Don’t Have It

Imagine, you are at the final stage of a job interview. Everything is going amazing and the recruiter promised you a position. You just need something minor, such as signing your contract. Now, you are waiting on the recruiter, who needs the last approval from the CEO, with whom you also spoke, and who is excited to have you on their team.

Yet, despite you already opening the bottle of champaign, telling all your friends about your recent success, and starting to spend the salary you still need to earn, at the last second the recruiter calls you and says that you didn’t actually get the job… What happened?

When Positive Intentions Don’t Work

I believe in positive intentions, meaning that if you are continuously sending positive vibrations into the universe, they will eventually give you what you want. And what is more positive than assuming that you have something before you have it?

However, after a lot of personal experience dealing with disappointments, I know that blind assumptions don’t work. After all, maybe the universe isn’t ready to give you exactly what you want. Maybe it didn’t finish rearranging itself and that shiny object in front of you isn’t what the universe planned for you.

You Are Hired! Not…

Coming back to your job application, it is very unlikely that you were the only applicant for the position in question and that at the last stage of the interview you were head-to-head with another candidate who was equally as (if not more) qualified.

As such, while you were waiting for that last signature, the company was making its last decision. Is it going to be you or the other person? And the reason you had your hopes up is that they told you that you got the job, in case you actually get the job.

It is almost like they just didn’t want to tell you that you won’t get the job, in case the other candidate decides to bail out at the last second, because they also said “yes” to the job, while also last minute deciding to bail out because of some other arrangements they had on their side.

And why not? Were they applying only for this position? Were you?

Smile and Say “Yes” Even If It Is a “No”

Sure, in a perfect world everyone would be upfront about everything and say exactly what they think. However, the modern world is the dog-eat-dog world, meaning that we need to reserve our true honesty only for certain people and certain situations.

Now, the overall lesson here is that until we have something in our hands, we don’t have it, as assuming otherwise is one of the best ways to get disappointed, and who likes that?

So keep your optimism up, keep that smile up, say “yes” even if it is “no,” and assume that others are doing the same. Let others prove you wrong and be happy when they do that all along waiting for the universe to give you exactly what you want. Until then, unless it’s not in your hand, it’s not yours.

Roman Russo

Roman Russo

Roman Russo is the visionary founder, senior happiness coach, and Chief Happiness Officer of Optimal Happiness. He has written the revolutionary Optimal Happiness: The Fastest and Surest Way to Reach Your Happiest Potential, a must-read book about achieving our happiest potential. After researching this field for over eight years, Roman is confident that anyone can become happy and invites us to undertake this transformation. Are you ready to start living the life you always meant to live?

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“The problem is that of optimization,” states Roman Russo, author of Optimal Happiness: The Fastest & Surest Way To Reach Your Happiest Potential. Most people will tell you how to be less unhappy or more happy, but no one is speaking about how to be the happiest we can be. And this is the difference that makes all the difference. By not looking at our happiest potential, we fall short of achieving it. After all, we all have hundreds of ideas on how to be happier or less sad, but most people still feel like they are not living their best lives. As such, Optimal Happiness explores the question of how to be the happiest we can be, regardless of who we are, where we are from, and what our life circumstances are. It proposes a complete formula for happiness and explains how to optimize the formula so we can be happy today and forever, breaking down what it really takes to become one of the happiest people alive (spoiler: it isn’t what most people think it is).

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