Why Self-Referencing Bias Prevents You From Being Happy

Self-referencing bias

Self-referencing bias prevents you from being happy because it refers to a belief that you are unique and the center of the universe, so to say, just because you are you. In terms of happiness, if ever you feel happy or unhappy, you believe that this is just the way it is, and you can’t do anything about it.

Why Self-Referencing Bias In Practice

You know you exist, but you can’t be sure that I live. This makes you feel special. Furthermore, everyone else tells you that you are unique. They say this because you have your own set of preferences, desires, and shopping behaviors, which society encourages you to explore. You walk, talk, and behave in a specific way, and therefore you am an individualist.

Happiness wise, society proposes you a specific road, which most of us follow. Generally speaking, it tells you that we need to go to school, get a job, a house, a car, marry someone, have children, and to do everything in the between. Thus, society promises you happiness and fulfilment. Yet, for many people who tried to follow this promised road through, they are still unhappy. What’s happening?

Self-referencing bias

The Problems Is Not With You

And so you are unhappy, or at least not as happy as you wish you were. In terms of self-reference bias, it means that you tried your best to be satisfied, and you failed to reach this desired state. 

Now, society will tell you that happiness is still possible and that this failure to reach well-being is your fault because you are not trying hard enough. Perhaps you need to buy a new set of different products, to travel more, and get a tattoo.

Self-referencing bias

How Limiting Beliefs Are Created Towards Happiness

In turn, you will rationalize your unhappiness. Maybe happiness is not possible, perhaps something is wrong with you, or satisfaction is not a reasonable goal. There can be several other limiting beliefs.

Either way, the self-referencing bias will state that because you didn’t get it and special, happiness is not possible overall. This is indeed one of the most basic and most profound limiting beliefs you can have as an individual, which will prevent you from being happy. 

In other words, the most significant restriction towards your happiness is you. 

Roman Russo: Author of Optimal Happiness

Roman Russo: Author of Optimal Happiness

Roman Russo wasn't always happy and struggled with his own negative emotions, anxieties, and depression, until one day he pledged to resolve this part of life, whatever it took. The journey took 6 years, but it was worth it. Today, Roman considers himself to be one of the happiest people alive, part of the 1% of the happiest elite, and he now teaches others a working and universal happiness formula to reach a similar goal. He offers his best advice on Optimal Happiness social media, newsletter, blog, and books, and teaches a complete and unconditional happiness formula in his online courses.

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“The problem is that of optimization,” states Roman Russo, author of Optimal Happiness: The Fastest & Surest Way To Reach Your Happiest Potential. There is plenty of advice on how to be happier or less sad, but no one is speaking about how to become the happiest we can be. And this is the difference that makes all the difference. By not looking at our maximum potential for happiness, we fall short of achieving it. After all, we all have hundreds of ideas on how to be happier or less sad, but most people still feel like they are not living their best lives. As such, Optimal Happiness explores the question of how to be the happiest we can be, regardless of who we are, where we are from, and what our life circumstances are. It proposes a complete and unconditional formula for happiness and explains how you too can become happy today and forever, inviting you to join the 1% happiness elite and become one of the happiest people alive.

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