I guess it is worth mentioning that nobody died or got physically hurt in this story. Still, happiness is a subjective concept, meaning that a specific life event can be traumatic for one person while liberating someone else. My story starts with the accumulation of small problems that have built into a big avalanche.
1st Happiness Advice
If you are alive and healthy, this should be condition enough to be happy.
2nd Happiness Advice
We experience small happy and sad moments daily. It is when we have way more / more intense happy or unhappy moments that it gets to us.
Problem #1 – A water bottle exploded inside my beg, damaging or destroying a book, two chargers, a bank card reading device, and my Mac Book Pro!
I mean, it sucks to lose a book, chargers, and bank reader, but losing a computer was a low blow, as I use it virtually daily for all my business needs, my financial survival.
First, I was still optimistic. I thought, “it is nothing, easily fixable, and I have a warranty.” I soon discovered that:
2 – water damage is not covered by warranty
3 – motherboard/logic board are damaged
4 – it will cost me 500 euro to fix the damage (almost 1/3 of the value of my Mac!)
5 – shipping on new pieces takes 3-4 weeks from Singapore – as I was then in Jakarta, Indonesia
6 – my flight the next day to Krabi, Thailand, for which I paid 130 euro nonrefundable
7 – there was no Apple office in Krabi, maybe in Bangkok, but I would have to wait the same 3-4 weeks for new parts
3rd Happiness Advice
Don’t panic! The bad things already happened, and “if you knew where you would fall, you would put a pillow.” Thus, the new best thing to do is to make a logical plan on how to deal with the situation
4th Happiness Advice
See negativity in the case, don’t feel the pain. This is easier said than done, but we need to learn to separate from our emotions and have a clear head if we want to solve our problems
Thus, I made a plan. I decided that having a computer was a priority and that in Singapore, I could fix it faster, and maybe even cheaper. So, I decided to fly to cancel my Krabi ticket and fly to Singapore. I re-booked my flight and went on my way.
Problem #8 – Flight got canceled. I’ve spent 9 hours in the airport waiting for my new flight, not knowing if I would fly or not, but luckily I was re-booked, got more free food than I could eat, and a 50$ “transportation voucher,” whatever that is.
5th Happiness Advice
See small wins whenever you go. Negative situations will always be there, but so will the positives, which I like to call “duality of life.” While it may not seem so immediately, all the problems that we have present advantages. In the case of losing a phone and PC, I discovered new freedom of disconnection that I didn’t have before that allowed me to go outside and to read a book.
Problem #9 – I was getting ready for my appointment at the Apple store, changing cloth, and taking a shower when my phone slipped from my pocket and felt inside a toilet. I reacted instantaneously, but these few seconds were enough for it to stop working…
And so I am left without any technology, in a foreign country, on the other side of the world from home, completely disconnected and frustrated. I already was looking at a 500 euro bill and now another cost that I could not imagine. I could only think of the best and the worst.
6th Happiness Advice
Always know the best-case scenario in mind and the worst-case scenario in everything. Prepare for the benefit and the cost of both situations, and you never be surprised or disappointed with anything.
So I walked to my appointment and gave away both my Mac and Phone for repairs. My phone was a Samsung, so I had to go to a different company. Surprisingly, Samsung is not at all pleasant when it comes to customer service:
10 – They told me that to repair my phone, they would delete all my phone data and that it was non-negotiable
11 – I did not have a warranty in Singapore, and even if I had, it would not cover water damage
12 – Parts for my model would have to be shipped to Singapore from Netherlands (!?!)
13 – I had to essentially permit Samsung to do whatever they wanted with my phone, even sell it, if I wanted them to fix it
14 – A damaged parts would have a price tag if something would need to be repaired
They would at least look at it first for 30$ before I knew what is wrong with it. Still, together, that was too much, but I didn’t have a choice. I needed my phone, so I gave it away.
To deal with the pain and emptiness, I decided to do something to cheer me up. Of course, there is a list of things we can do to deal with different negative emotions. I decided to do some less healthy items, yet more emotionally gratifying things, such as eating chocolate, shopping, and going to a cinema. Especially, sugar and movies/series are my biggest addictions. I know them to be so, but I also know them not to be that bad, so occasionally and against a better logical judgment, I allow myself to do them.
7th Happiness Advice
check my list of things you can do to deal with negative emotions right now here.
8th Happiness Advice
take control of your addictions and other negative patterns today (coming soon).
As the story continues, I am only sure that I will pay 500 euro for my laptop and be ready in 2-3 days. I have no information about my phone yet. Still, I am prepared to buy a new second-hand phone if I have to. This is my solution. It will cost me money, but it is only money. The sooner I pay it, the sooner I can get my life back on track.
9th Happiness Advice
pay your price tags as soon as possible. The longer you linger, wondering about what to do and how unlucky you are to have problems that you do, the unhappier you will be. Happy and mature people make decisions fast and continue their lives much more comfortable because of the fact.
Funny enough, I told my friend back in Jakarta what happened. It turns out my friends proclaimed that it was all their fault that my computer and phone got damaged, as they invited me there is the first place, and if I didn’t come to these problems would not happen. My friend was already telling me about difficulties in life he has, as we all have them, and claimed that it was some sort of negative aura that he transferred on to me. I tried to convince that person that it was not their fault, but some people are so stuck in their reality they don’t think it is changeable, while it is, such as you can see in this story!
10th Happiness Advice
always take responsibility for everything, even the things technically are not your fault. Once you assume responsibility, you can start fixing these problems, whereas before, we usually leave them to whoever else we think is responsible.
Don’t believe in negative energies. This is irrational, though, wholly unfounded and unprovable . This is again one way we put responsibility outside our hands. It is better to have positive thinking, not because of the law of attraction, but because we stop thinking of being a victim and start thinking about solutions in a clear head.
Lastly, I believe that happiness is an art and a science. Indeed, the more we understand happiness and what makes us (un)happy, the happier we can be. It is like a puzzle where the more pieces we can get right, the happier we become. Knowing the techniques mentioned above is excellent, but it is not enough to be satisfied. For Unconditional Happiness, I recommend seeing my book for all advice on happiness.
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